How do I help a person who loves me so much and I have never got feelings for him?

  • I would advise you not to get into a relationship with him. Don’t fake love to please anyone. Because then, you will be lying to him. Love isn’t something that is forced. That’s why it’s called falling in love. You don’t look, decide about it and then fall, do you? It just happens. If you get into a relationship for the heck of it, you won’t give it your 100%. You won’t be able to return the love, attention or care you get. Things will turn ugly for both of you. And in the future, you’ll hurt him much more than you’d hurt him by not getting into a relationship with him at present. All his false hopes will come crashing down and all he will be left with is a broken heart and memories that refuse to part. If you don’t truly love someone, don’t date that person.
    Instead, tell him clearly what equation you share with him. Make things clear. Don’t leave him hanging on a string of false hope and then cut the string off, sending him crashing down. Tell him you don’t have the same feelings for him as he has for you. I know it’s hard for him to accept it. But not loving someone is better than hurting someone. Explain this to him and I hope he understands.
  • You haven’t mentioned your feelings for him so I assume you do not love him in the same way he does. I can understand both you and him since I was in the both situations. The concern you have is human feeling of compassion and should not be confused with love. The only good that you can do is avoid him altogether and help him convert his love to bitterness and later to numbness to you. He will feel hurt by your avoidance and will hate you for that. But those will be his initial reactions. With time he will be numb to your presence. Both of you could move on. You may be the current source of his depression. But I am pretty sure you are not the only one reason. He has to take professional help. It should not come from you as it would mean he would see soft side of yours and will use it to manipulate you. I know it sucks and I hated the girl I loved who did not reciprocated just like you. But now those are the memory that have helped to see past my own desires and be compassionate to girls. Sometimes the silent treatment is the best one.
  • Unfortunately no, you should not try to get into relationship with him. I would encourage you to try and be friends while keeping your boundaries strong. You can’t force yourself to be in love, and depression doesn’t really lead to romance. You mainly feel sorry for him, which is not a healthy beginning to a relationship at all.

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