1. By becoming more rational and objective and learning to accept your reality.
The Five-Step Practice of Acceptance,
Which consists of three main skills, objective distance, acceptance, and reason.
-) Abiding in a more objective distance
-) Accepting and embracing the reality of the situation
-) Working to limit instinctual reactivity from arising
-) Apply reason to gain understanding
-) If moved, act to improve the situation
* Step one, begin by learning to abide in a more objective distance by slowing down, focusing on the breath, and becoming present in the current moment. Take a step back from your perception of the world to create a slight distance between yourself and reality. Now, shift your awareness from the doing mind to the observing mind, abiding less as the doer of actions and more as the observing witness. Experientially, you may feel a shift in perception as your inner-world and outer-world come into harmony and balance. Compulsive thinking may begin to fall away, along with the intense immediacy that normally plagues us, which is replaced by a spacious, clear, and open objectivity. Our aim is that through practice, this state of objective distance can become a nearly continuous state of mind, our default-mindset where the mind consistently abides. From within this state, when difficulties arise, we’re prepared, and have the space to operate effectively.
* Step, step two, is to accept whatever may arise and openly embrace the reality of the situation.
* Step three you remain watchful, working to limit any impulsive, involuntary reactivity that may arise.
* Step four is to apply reason to gain insight into your problems within their larger context.
* Step five, with the understanding gained from this method you can maturely decide whether to ignore the situation or to take actions to resolve it.
2. In these times, this is called a “luxury problem”.
Realize and understand that everything (or even most things) are not about you.
This is probably going to sound mean, but it’s both really arrogant and insecure behavior.
Find something you love to do, that you have a real passion for and go there. You will be too busy to worry.
My Grammie always said ‘What people think is not your business. If they want you to know, they’ll tell you.
My father says ‘Stop renting out the space in your head so other people can live there. Sweetie, you don’t have that much space’.
And I say be kind to yourself and even kinder to others, cause somewhere, someone is having a real hard time and could probably use your help.
3. Question people’s opinions and fact check to see if it even applies to you.
It’s okay if someone says something bad about you because not everyone will think the same about you, and you can’t expect them to see things how you see them. It’s not worth it to fight the whole world just because they have a negative perception of you. Their perception might be wrong, so.
Some will like you and some won’t like you, and there’s no amount of convincing that will change that.
People are allowed to have opinions, but they aren’t allowed to force them.
If someone is disrespectful then you can confront them diplomatically, rather than just taking what they said and going home.
But if you hate yourself or have low self-esteem then you won’t question people and you’ll take everything personally.
4. Not to take things personally is self-protection. Besides, not everything in the world is about you. So, just think that whatever was said or done was not for you, unless it was directly addressed to you.
Life isn’t fair and most folks really don’t care enough about you for you to take it personally. Life is hard.. once you get that it gets easier.
Understand what the intention of what is being said is. Another thing, get over your self. Only those who think about themselves too much, tend to take things personally.
with lots of practice. Start with one example, work out what you reacted to, and develop something else to say or do. watch closely, and repeat as necessary.