Does indecisiveness usually mean all the options are equally good?

  1. Not necessarily all good. Indecisiveness can result when all the options are equally good, or equally bad, or equally mixed, and the person whose decision it is unable to tease apart good, bad and indifferent factors, separate them and weigh them up. Come to a decision. The uncertainty of outcomes may play into it. This or that option may look good now – but how will they play out? Might I not regret my choice?

Any of us may be prone to indecisiveness in given moments, where clarity lacks or great things weigh in the balance. Over and above all that, though, “indecisiveness” is often applied as a character trait to people who habitually encounter difficulty in weighing options and making decisions.

Important to note: “indecisiveness” only applies where one has to or wants to make a decision. They are there in the moment, and circumstances dictate they are the one who must decide. If you offer someone a decision they don’t care about, something trivial that doesn’t affect them, something they have no personal need to decide now but could as well decide next week or never, this is not really indecision. All the urgency in the matter is yours, not theirs. They don’t really have a decision to make. At least, not one they must make.

A person who is “undecided” or “noncommittal” in a given matter is not thereby “indecisive.” It’s simply that there has never been any reason they had to decide. They can continue undecided until further experience decides them, if they like. Perhaps gathering and weighing new information. Perhaps not thinking about it at all.

I mention it because some people seem to think it reflects poorly about them if they haven’t decided on anything and everything that has more than one side. Often they plump for some position on scant basis, a “decision” where they “decide what is true” rather than investigate, gather, identify and weigh all factors and decide from what is true. These people aren’t decisive, so much as they are superficial and inconsiderable blockheads. The fact that so many of them compound the frivolity of their conclusions with obstinacy in maintaining them is a similar mistake. They observe courage of well-examined, well-founded convictions is a mark of character, so they think courage of unfounded, unexamined convictions will be just as good.

In the moment of decision you have everything you know, everything you value and consider important, everything you can find out just then, and that’s all you have. Decisiveness is a character of mind that can perceive what’s in play and what’s at stake, and from there reckon quickly and well to a decision well-founded and well-considered – even if it took little time. Looking back on the decision, we may have cause to regret what we did not know then. Typically we will still find our decision sound, based only on what we knew.

Decisiveness is far less about clarity and rapidity of thought in the moment than it is about how much prior consideration has gone into what you value, what you prioritize, and how things work in this world. It’s when we really don’t know what we want – haven’t really thought it through – that we are paralyzed by indecision as we try to work all that out with the pressure on. Prior preparation and a thoroughness of examination (esp. self-examination) is what enables one to size up and weigh options readily, and respond to opportunities with decision.

2.

Indecisiveness can mean many different things. It can mean all the known options are roughly equally good. Or the options are equally bad and one feels forced to choose the lesser of two or more “evils”. Or some combination of good and bad. Or that the best option is yet unknown and hasn’t shown up yet. Or the person isn’t ready to commit to something and needs to “live with” the idea for a while longer. Or they need more time to “try on” the options in their imagination to settling on an answer yes or no. Some people just don’t want to take responsibility so avoid making a decision, on general principles, or they figure the matter will likely resolve itself so they don’t need to do anything. So many possibilities here.

3.

It usually means we are still living in the many weak states of Fear, where anything or even everything can and will go wrong!

Once we choose to: a) step out of Fear; b) turn around; and c) start our own personal version of The Way towards fulfilling our Destinies of Becoming Love Personified, we understand that the universe has our back and to Fear the future is an incorrect attitude about our journey!

Most of society is set up to have us stay, just barely surviving in the many weak states of Fear; so that we are much easier to control. Billions are spent each year to ensure that we get the messages about where we should stay! Most humans do so!

We are indecisive because we assume we will choose badly and lose ; all in a universe that has not selected for us and is inherently dangerous! This universe is not like that!

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